So Reading Festival

So, Reading festival is just around the corner and I won’t lie I can’t fucking wait! I have earlybird entry so i will be going on Wednesday (5 days). It will be 5 nights of living like a gypsy getting dirty to the point where I will more likely than not be able to smell my own armpit. Now you might think that sounds awful but I like a good armpit…

I originally said as a new year resolution I would blog once a week for a year, that went pretty tits up and I lost the motivation to do it and it became not as fun as it was when I first started. I will start to blog again but not once a week, more as and when I feel like I have something that people will find interesting to read.

A lot of stuff happened between now and the last time I did a blog post so I will write about some of the most recent things. I was lucky enough to go the the Olympic football final with my friends Tom and Andrew and it was amazing! (Neymar is a god) After we saw the match we got the tube to Hyde Park to watch Mo Farah and the 4×100 relay on the big screen we arrived just as Mo was on his last lap and as we ran into the park he crossed the line in first place and 100 to 200,000 people went crazy jumped and cheered. Was perhaps one of the best  experiences of my life! On the way back from Hyde Park to the tube station I jumped on a balloon at which my friend Andrew laughed at then had the piss taken out of his laugh by some tramps. I don’t really think traps are in the position to laugh at anyone but what you gonna do…

I have started to learn to drive, it was all fun until I had to go on roundabouts, now I hate it! Last night I practiced a couple of maneuvers in my Mum’s car which was fairly fun as a I got to show off what I can do.

I can’t really think of much more to write so I will leave it here. I hope to do another blog soon depending on how this one goes down. Thank you very much for reading this. Much love and I hope you are enjoying your summer and People who got the A level results are happy with what you all got!

I will leave you with a picture of a real Mexican man wearing a sombrero

Thanks for reading ❤



I start with an apology, yeah sorry. I would like to say that 3 weeks of love has gone into writing this blog but it hasn’t. So you can have 25 minutes of love while I have some free time, smilyface.

I have discovered something during this exam period that I didn’t realise about myself. When i did my GCSEs I didn’t worry, I had no fear, this maybe because I didn’t care but none the less they were not something that worried me. In January I wasn’t fazed by the exams but on Friday I had an English exam and I have never felt fear like it before. While I am made jump easy, scared of cats, spiders, horses, pregnant women, fire, driving past lorries and crossing the road I don’t consider myself as a “scared” person.  At least not when it comes to exams. But the anxiety I experienced on Friday was horrible, whether it was because my future pivoted on how I did or just because I felt like I wasn’t ready. My friends will vouch for me when I say this but I looked and was fucking terrified. So right now I would like to admit I am scared of the future, scared of exams and also scared of doing an Inbetweeners and shitting in the middle of my exam.

Over the last few weeks I have been doing not enough revision and not enough social activity. I can’t pinpoint exactly what I have done but I can say that Drogba is a tank of FIFA. I spend most of my time moaning about how me and my friends seem to have less parties to go to but last week I got 2. The first of which was pretty awesome my personal highlight was finding a shower which i loved and decided to have 2 showers in the space of 8 hours. Resulting in some unsightly photographs. The second party was just as good, it was my girlfriends 17th and it was great to be with her and see her happy.

I am really looking forward for the exams to end so i can have time off and see what my social life brings me, whether it is meeting new friends or getting closer to the ones I love the most I look forward to either or both outcome. All I know is thank fuck this year is coming to an end. I most definitely need some rest!

I will cut this blog short as FIFA beckons me, so love you all from my middle.

Thank you for reading you beauts!

I will leave you with a picture of a car with post-it notes on it :).

What I look forward to and 1000!

Right, blog. Yeah.

I won’t lie this here is my Monday night boredom cure. Don’t get me wrong I have had a fantastic day but Monday evening won’t be winning any prizes soon!

So if this blog gets the normal amount of views they usually get I should easily go past 1000 reads. When I started writing this I never thought so many people would take an interest into what I write but for some reason my anecdotes of events that are not particularly, pardon the pun, eventful. So thank you for everyone who has read it even the 2 people from Portugal last week.

Anyway, for those who do not know I am a referee for the Hampshire FA. I had really enjoyed refereeing until yesterday. I will put it this way. I was paid £22 to be abused for an hour and a half. I did not enjoy it, or the hailstones and rain.

Last week was such a boring week of college, to make it better I took the decision to not go to sociology. For any who doesn’t do sociology, it’s shit. After being told I need to go to sociology i go to the first lesson for this week, no teacher. Yeah a very happy Jack had a very early 12:40 finish!

I will finish this with something I am looking forward to. Call it sad and girl if you want. But my Mum’s wedding is going to be amazing. This Saturday I am getting suits which are fun. Then I will be going on both hen and stag do. (hen do is quad biking how could I say no). Then the wedding itself, am going with my best friend and we will get absolutely mortal! And maybe play some golf

So thank you very much for reading. I hope you all have fantastic weeks, unless you’re the twats who I reffed this weekend who i hope have bad night’s sleep.

Also have a picture from prom. Look close at my friend on the far left!

Please check out my family friend’s blog it’s fantastic.

And also please check out my good friend Chelcie’s blog.

What a whole lot of Easter!

Right, this is a VERY overdue blog. (3 weeks) so many apologies. I would like to be able to say it was because over Easter my social life flourished or that I was doing loads of revision but no, I can’t pinpoint what exactly I spent my time doing but I did spend a good chunk of it drinking tea in Sainsbury’s cafe. You may call that boring but I can’t think of anything better than drinking and eating until your bum hurts from sitting down!

Be request from my friend Tom I will do a small section about eggs. Personally I hate eggs, they’re vile. They smell, look and taste bad. I don’t see why they appeal to anyone. This becomes a totally different story when talking about Haribo eggs though. They are peng, no arguing that!

Anyway… my Easter holidays were pretty good, I got to see my friends who i love dearly. It’s time away from college when you find out who your real friends are and begin to carve out your close friend groups without the annoying people you have to put up with day in and day out. My close friends will know who I am talking about. If you don’t this may be some help “hahaha”.

My friend Bronia deserves a huge shout for being awesome and letting us steal her house on a couple of occasions over Easter and being a maid to us no matter how rude we were to her!

Two weeks ago now I got my ear pierced and now have a stretcher in it. I am happy to say I was a man and I didn’t feel any pain what so ever! If that doesn’t get me lad points I don’t know what will! This, having a shave and a very bad hair cut has completed my batty look and I am 100% knob. Brilliant…

So after these holidays I am more tired, less hairy, have metal in my ear, very hayfeaverish and looking a tad muscleier than when I started the 2 weeks. Success. Definitely!

Thank you very much for reading. Hope you feel much wiser after this dribble… Love you all hope you had a great Easter ❤

Also here is a sexy picture of oneself.

How to be and not to be a “college kid”

I won’t lie, I like college; I like being with my friends; I like being grown up and I like having free time. Some of my favourite moments of last year were on my frees in the college cafe. But there is a few things that I hate. I mean HATE.

I will start with the wanna-be Slash who is on everyone’s free, these guys are worse than the plague, I am talking about the arseholes who sit and play their preferred instrument for everyone to hear. I myself play, take the piss if you wish, bass and the ukulele. I do not bring these in and throw an open for all gig on the table I am sat at. Yes fair enough if you’re Dave Grohl or Flea and have actual talent but if you are just an average player put you guitar back in your bag and stop it. I do not want to hear.

Another way one can be an arsehole is to stop in the main corridor in the college, or the “street” if you wish to call it that, and hold everyone up. Despite my height I am a fast walker so when I get wind up teeth and am motoring around college to then get stopped by an idiot who decides in the doorway to tie their shoelace is to say the least very annoying! Pisstake!

I will now say how to become a “college kid”. Be bold, be brave and be individual. Sorted. Example: College yesterday were offering cinema tickets or a pen if you’re an exciting person, in return for you doing a Chlamydia test. I know I don’t have it, not 100% sure but almost certain, so this was done with some confidence. You don’t understand how horrible it is to walk down the corridor in college with a tube of warm pee in your pocket. But what was worse was peeing in the bottle that is quite a lot smaller than your thing (some skill was needed). A tip to anyone doing this… Fill out the info on the bag before putting the bottle of pee in the bag and sealing it. Writing on a bag containing a tube or warm wee was not fun!

Today was one of the best days of my life, 30 vs 30 football game during lunch no rules as such as I did use my hand. Playing around groups of people shielding themselves from 60 people chasing one ball. This was all fun until i was pushed face first into a holly bush, i can tell you that it fucking hurts! Yeah we lost the indie cup 2012 6-1.

Now I am not saying to be a cool college kid you need to pee in a pot but just be adventurous, stop being so boring. You only get one life so enjoy it. Steve Jobs said-

“If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you’ll most certainly be right.”

I heard this over a year ago and I still say it to myself every morning. Be happy people! ❤

Happy little talk.

I have been listening to nothing but Arctic Monkeys for 2 weeks solid. My head may hurt but I feel “bare indie”, happy and in the mood for summer. I can’t wait to piss away my money on summer clothes!Looking forward to showing off my shins in some nice shorts to the ladies and bringing out the upper arm in a lush t-shirt.

Summer for me is a love hate relationship, by this I mean I hate the battle with keeping dry armpits but I love everything else.

For me and my friends the word “Chatsworth” is a word that brings memories and happiness to everyone. For those who don’t know what “Chatsworth” is itself is a field near where I live but it is on this field where we, usually, once a week play football on. The girls sit an bath in the sun, the guys play football and have a laugh. Everyone gets along and for me this is the single best thing about summer!

Just a short one felt like writing something…

Thanks for reading ❤

A Spectacularly Boring Week.

As I said in the title of this blog entry my week was far from exciting, college did not make me happy like normal and the football was terribly sad.

I start with Friday (the first notable day of my week), I went on a morning trip to Portsmouth on a university fair. I already know what I want to do and roughly what I want to do so the nature of the trip was mainly for shiggles (shits and giggles). I found it a challenge to get as many pens as I could, now this may sound easy but pretending you want to study at the university of Aberystwyth (in Wales) is very difficult! Also going round with a friend who is likely to be going to either Oxford or Cambridge is very funny when you see them get dragged to a bad university and have to endure five minutes of babble about a course not even I would do!

If you do not like football or sensitive subjects do not read this next paragraph.

Saturday for me was very emotional, for some this will be alien but for me this is something I found very choking. Fabrice Muamba ages 23 had a cardiac arrest when playing for Bolton against Spurs near the centre circle. Both crowd and players alike were distressed. I found this thoroughly upsetting (watching with a 15 minute delay). This happening brought back horrible memories of Marc Foe who died 6 (I think) years ago in the Confederations Cup semi finals in very similar circumstances. Thankfully due to better awareness of such situations Muamba has a better chance to fight for his life and is now actually making great progress. So I speak for everyone when I say: please pray for Muamba, his family and his friends.

You can read the rest though!

On a lighter note I had quite a good mothers day (selfish I know), I went to great efforts to get a card, no lie there was actually thinking involved! But sadly for my Mum she dropped her iPhone and royally trashed it! So we ended up going to town to get it fixed, happily for me a trip to town usually involves a gift so I went home a happy lad clutching a TopMan bag.

 So if you can’t guess I did not much this week so writing this and gently massaging Arnica gel into    my tender feeling ankle has to be the highlight of my week!

Ps, I wore a shirt to college today, yes it looked formal but there was nothing wrong with it so   yeah. Cock off! I did look like a wanker though. Wont stop me doing it again!

Thank you very much for reading, want a funny one this week I am sorry but you arseholes haven’t invited me to any parties last 2 weeks! ❤

Please help support my very close friends band FlashFires buy buying their new EP on iTunes for just £2.50 or by liking their page on facebook.

                                                                                                 ^^ They didn’t ask me to do that.

Getting older rant! & Reading!!!

So today had been everything Reading, so I can’t not talk about it! I have been looking forward to the line up since last Friday (when I got my ticket.) I missed the chance to see Foo’s last year as I got them for the same day as my prom. (That right there is the definition of “gutted”). Needless to say I was very happy when the rumours of them headlining Sunday were proven to be true. Kasabian headlining on the other day, quite excited about that, I think they would be absolutely crazy to see live! And finally, The Cure. Shame on you if you don’t know who they are! Look them up if you don’t!

Anyway, we all know about Reading I don’t want to go on about it forever! I would talk about my week like normal but all I did was get my results and pay for a re-take. So, I would like to talk about turning 18, this is something that after we have our first alcoholic drink (usually Vodka poured into a coke bottle) we just can’t wait to happen. Being able to but my alcohol is not my highlight for me, having a birthday in November means it will be me and only a few other people who are fresh being 18 going to a night club and wishing we could be with our 17 year old friends. I look forward more to being able to not having to ask my Mum for things, I inevitably will still do this, but just the thought of being able to say “fuck you, I am going out”, just excites me! But this will almost certainly result me standing at the bus stop for 10 minutes (just outside my house) as I cannot yet drive.

Being 17 is just a drag, in May I am due to have treatment on my coccyx but due to the shitty “4” following “199” on my birth certificate I will be spending my time on a children’s ward surrounded by kids. Personally this is hell for me (feel free to joke, I know you will…) I do not want to sit with little kids making fuck loads of noise while I have to recover from a doctor playing around with my bum area.

I will finish this with saying what I want to do when I finish college. I would like to study sports psychology. But I need some advice! Where is good for this course, I know Canterbury is good for it but any other suggestions? And if anyone has done this please tell me what it is like!

Thank you very much for reading, love all of you! ❤

Here is a picture of my attempt at a jam sandwich.

Please check out my friend’s blog! If you love football or anything satirical this is where it’s at!

Chucked out!

Boiling hot week and the t-shirts come out, everyone happy until it gets cold. Just as the boobs started to come out…

Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday were pretty crap, I don’t think many can argue that. Only thing that happened was having my Mum not pay for my Reading ticket which almost killed me because I had to gather a lot of money in very little time but I managed to do it in two days. Even did myself proud! I hope that the fake line-ups are true, The cure, Tenacious D and the Foos is just heavenly!

On Saturday I had a party before I tell i would like to say I am getting fed up of these strange and really eventful parties, I just want to get drunk! Nice calm one next time please! Anyway, we were at this party and I was in the first ten to arrive (never good). So, I was stood in the front room of his and his Dad walks in to see me stood in HIS house with a beer in my hand, I dread to think what was going through his mind! Yeah we got kicked out… Ended up in a field. College has gotten so classy!

Sunday was one of the worst days of my life! Hungover, waking up at 7 to have an entire day of practical coaching assessment in the rain and snow. In the eight hours of snow/rain running I discovered my waterproof jacket is not that waterproof, but the hood can be used as a great


Horrible week. Horrible Monday. Lets hope for better!

Kid in my English wore this disgusting hat. Just had to share it!Love you all. Have a great week! <3Ps please check out my friend Darren’s blog!

Not the best idea…

Thinking about it telling my Mum to “piss off” and “shut the fuck up” was not the best of ideas (especially 2 weeks before Reading tickets) but it certainly did feel good. I have been on edge the last few days minimal sleep and endless amounts of work has taken its toll on me. So bad I haven’t played FIFA in quite a while.

So I write this blog very tired; one day late and in the most foul of moods. None the less I am getting it done maybe not with the best quality but I am getting it done.

After this weekends football I have gained a lot of respect for the welsh but after being shit at penalties I hate them again.

I cant help but get increasingly inpatient about Reading Festival every “leaked” line up has looked nothing short of my dream festival (minus RHCP). There is only two people who need to be omitted from these line ups and they are the most unimaginative song writers Edwin Sheeran and Florence and some Machine.

Before I flip because of writing stuff that makes me angry I will leave and watch Geordie Shore and hopefully laugh some :).

Good night guys, fucking love you! Here is a fat photo of what I used to look to make you all happy ❤Image